


Not So Quiet Company

by lotsofquestionslimitedanswers



Series: Finding Our Missing Pieces [2]
Category: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, Wiedźmin | The Witcher Series - Andrzej Sapkowski
Genre: Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Jaskier | Dandelion Has a Past, Jaskier | Dandelion Needs a Hug, Nightmares, Oops, Protective Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg, When did that happen?, Yennskier, accidentally caring for the bard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-27
Updated: 2020-05-27
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:46:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24398974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lotsofquestionslimitedanswers/pseuds/lotsofquestionslimitedanswers
Summary: Jaskier has a nightmare and Yennefer tries to help. She finds out some terrible truths about Jaskier's childhood.Excerpt:Yennefer’s not even sure why she asks, but before she knows it, she’s asking, “What did you see?”Jaskier shakes his head and swipes his sleeve across his eyes. “Nothing,” he whispers.“That wasn’t nothing.” Yennefer finds herself taking one of Jaskier’s hands in her own.Her action surprises her. When did the bard become so important to her? They don’t spend a lot of time alone. Either Geralt or Ciri or both are always with them. So, how did they get here? When did Jaskier become someone Yennefer aches to hold and protect? She loves him as much as she loves Geralt. She has known for a while. She just doesn’t know when or how it happened.
Relationships: Jaskier | Dandelion/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg
Series: Finding Our Missing Pieces [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1750042
Comments: 10
Kudos: 130





	Not So Quiet Company

**Author's Note:**

> This happens shortly after Jaskier, Geralt, Ciri, and Yennefer begin traveling together.
> 
> (If you read part 1 of this series, this takes place years before Jaskier dies and comes back to life.)
> 
> (You don't need to have read the first part to read this one.)
> 
> The Geralt/Yennefer/Jaskier ship is mentioned but Geralt is only mentioned in this fic; he doesn't make an appearance.

**_Yennefer_ **

Yennefer walks into their room at the inn to find Jaskier curled up on the bed. She shouldn’t be surprised the bard is asleep given that he spent nearly the entirety of the previous night performing. Geralt and Ciri are off training and Yennefer just finished exploring the town they’re staying in. So, Yennefer quietly closes the door behind her and goes to the desk in the corner of the room where she reads for a while, enjoying Jaskier’s silent company.

That is, until Jaskier turns into not-so-quiet company.

Yennefer hears Jaskier stir. At first, she thinks it’s nothing, but then she hears him whimper, “No…please… _no._ ”

Yennefer freezes. A chill makes its way up her spine, followed by a slow, _burning_ rage. Who did this to Jaskier? Who _dared_ hurt him?

“No,” Jaskier says—louder this time—in a voice laced with fear.

Yennefer gets up too quickly; she knocks over the chair as she makes her way over to the bed. She stops short once she gets there. She finds herself staring as Jaskier makes small sounds of pain, writhing a little in the bed with fear etched upon his face. She has never seen him like this.

What the fuck is she supposed to do?

She has helped calm Ciri down after her nightmares numerous times. She has even helped Geralt a time or two with his. But not Jaskier, never Jaskier. Yennefer didn’t even know the bard _had_ nightmares like this.

“Stop!” Jaskier yells. He’s shaking. “Please—please! _Stop!_ ”

Something twists in the pit of Yennefer’s stomach.

Yennefer launches herself onto the bed, sitting on her knees beside Jaskier, shaking his shoulders. “Wake up!” Yennefer has to yell to be heard over Jaskier’s pleas for some invisible force to stop.

To stop _what?_ What are they doing to him? What’s making him sweat and scream and shake like this? If Yennefer’s being honest, she’s not sure she wishes to know. Once she finds out, she’s going to want to rip out the throat of whoever made Jaskier feel this way.

Jaskier wakes up with a gasp. His eyes widen when they focus on Yennefer. “Um,” Jaskier whispers in a shaky voice. His cheeks are red. He’s blinking back tears and his mouth is shaking.

Yennefer moves so she’s no longer leaning over Jaskier. She sits beside Jaskier, trying not to touch him.

Yennefer’s not even sure _why_ she asks, but before she knows it, she’s asking, “What did you see?”

Jaskier shakes his head and swipes his sleeve across his eyes. “Nothing,” he whispers.

“That wasn’t nothing.” Yennefer finds herself taking one of Jaskier’s hands in her own.

Her action surprises her. When did the bard become so important to her? They don’t spend a lot of time alone. Either Geralt or Ciri or both are always with them. So, how did they get here? When did Jaskier become someone Yennefer aches to hold and protect? She loves him as much as she loves Geralt. She has known for a while. She just doesn’t know when or how it happened.

No.

That’s not true. She _does_ know how. It’s because he’s Jaskier. He’s the one who lightens the mood with a smile or a stupid joke or a song. He’s the one who braids Ciri’s hair and sings her lullabies. He collects needed plants for Yennefer’s and Geralt’s potions. He sneaks Roach apples and Ciri sweets when he thinks no one’s looking. He buys Yennefer soft blankets and rubs her shoulders when she’s angry or in pain or just plain sad. He patches Geralt up after hunts and gets himself into trouble trying to defend Geralt time and time again. Jaskier does his best to protect Geralt from cruel people. Jaskier has started to do the same for Yennefer in places that don’t take kindly to mages. Geralt and Yennefer don’t _need_ Jaskier’s protection, but it’s…kind… _loving_ even. More than Yennefer is used to; that’s for sure.

And now, Jaskier has woken up from a nightmare that made him scream and has left him in tears.

It just doesn’t seem right. What could Jaskier have possibly done to deserve this?

“Whatever you saw, that couldn’t have been nothing, Jaskier. Not if it made you react like this.” Yennefer says.

For a few horrible moments, Jaskier just stares at Yennefer as tears begin to spill down his face. Then he whispers, “My parents…they were…they were unkind.” He looks away and shakes his head. “But…but it’s nothing like the childhoods you and Geralt had to endure. It’s…my problems are nothing.”

Yennefer is stunned for a moment. How could Jaskier say that? How could he even _think_ that? He’s just as important as the rest of them. Clearly, he went through something awful; otherwise, he wouldn’t be crying.

“ _No_.” Yennefer says it louder than she means to.

Jaskier jumps and stares at Yennefer with wide blue eyes full of tears. Yennefer finds herself desperately wanting to hug Jaskier, but she’s not sure this is the time. Not yet.

Yennefer starts talking again, but this time in a quieter voice, “Jaskier, your problems are not nothing. You still cry from whatever horrors you were forced to endure as a child. That’s not nothing.”

Jaskier’s face scrunches together and he lets out a small sob. “It’s not that bad. Really. I just…wasn’t what they wanted. I’m noble-born.” Jaskier takes a shaky breath. “They wanted me to be a knight. Can you imagine? _Me?_ A _knight?_ ”

“Sir Julian Pankratz.” Yennefer whispers. She tries to imagine Jaskier in armor, but it’s hard—not because he looks weak or small; he’s nearly as tall as Geralt—but because she has only seen Jaskier wear his outrageous (fun) clothing. And because she hasn’t seen Jaskier fight with a sword before…only with stolen punches at people who are rude to Geralt or Ciri or Yennefer…he has the kind of heart a knight is supposed to have (but rarely do). He’s kind, brave, impulsive, self-sacrificing, and strong. No one can travel with a witcher for decades without being strong in body, mind, and spirit.

Jaskier laughs as more tears pour down his face. It’s a bitter laugh that Yennefer hopes to never hear again. “Yeah, _that_ ,” Jaskier shakes his head. “I could never be that. I’m not…I’m not brave enough or…or strong enough. I’m terrible at running.”

Yennefer cuts Jaskier off by saying, “Actually, I’ve seen you run. You’re quite fast.”

Jaskier laughs again, but this time it’s more sincere. “I didn’t used to be…guess getting chased by monsters is good practice.” Jaskier sniffles and smiles a sad smile that doesn’t quite meet his eyes.

“And…you’re quite brave too.” Yennefer presses on. “You decided to follow Geralt for _years_ in search of adventure. And you’re still here. You’re either incredibly stupid or incredibly brave. Now, don’t get me wrong, I used to lean more towards the incredibly stupid theory, but now that I’ve gotten to know you more, I’m leaning more towards brave. Firstly, because you put yourself in harm’s way to save Ciri constantly. Just last week, you flirted with that Nilfgardian soldier so we could sneak her out of town. The week before, you _stabbed_ someone who tried to take her.”

“Anyone would’ve done that.” Jaskier cuts in.

Yennefer puts her hand up. “You killed him. With a fork. It was foolish but brave.”

“Ciri’s worth it.” Jaskier shrugs.

“You put yourself in harm’s way to save Geralt too—don’t think I don’t know about your habit of distracting monsters to save Geralt.”

“How else would I have become such a good sprinter?”

“You also protect him from townspeople who want to hurt him—you distract them with songs while he leaves town, you start brawls in taverns to defend his honor, you protect Roach too.”

“Roach is a good girl. And Geralt deserves better than the cruelty he faces.”

“See? That’s just it. A lesser person would be afraid of Geralt. They would not even _consider_ helping him. You do. You’re better than any knight I’ve ever met. You’re so good to all of us. You put yourself in harm’s way to save me too—from disgusting men who do not take no for an answer, from almost falling off that cliff that one time.”

“I wouldn’t exactly call that me saving you. I almost dropped you and you had to save us with a portal in the end.”

“We’re both here now though. That’s the important part. And it’s not so much the results of your efforts, but the fact that you _tried_ to save me. Your first instinct was to try to grab me before I fell to my doom.”

Yennefer’s not even sure _why_ she was standing so close to the edge. Then the world was sinking and Geralt, Ciri, and Jaskier were screaming her name. She remembers Jaskier’s hand clutching her arm and some mixture of determination and panic in his eyes. Despite the dangerous (and embarrassing) circumstances, the memory is a fond one for Yennefer. It was when Yennefer realized Jaskier cared about her just as much as he cared about Geralt and Ciri.

Jaskier looks away from Yennefer.

“Jaskier? Please look at me.” Yennefer takes Jaskier’s hand and gives it a gentle squeeze.

Jaskier looks at Yennefer again.

“It sounds like your home was just as cold and lonely as ours were.” Yennefer says. “It was just…prettier, I suppose. That doesn’t make your pain any less real than ours.”

Jaskier nods and sniffles.

Yennefer hugs Jaskier. He hugs her back, crying silently into her shoulder. “It’s safe to cry here.” Yennefer tells Jaskier and then presses a kiss into his hair.

Jaskier lets out a small sob. Then another and another. Each new sob is harsher than the last until Jaskier is crying loudly, choking on his sobs, hugging Yennefer tightly with his face buried in her shoulder.

“I just wanted to make music.” Jaskier sobs. “And they—and they _hated_ me for it! They—they—they hurt me because of it. They ran me out of my home because of it.” Jaskier coughs. “They said I was too loud—too annoying—they—they said I talked too much! They said I was too much to handle! They said—they said no one would love me if I kept being me!”

“You didn’t deserve that.” Yennefer says, gently running her fingers through Jaskier’s hair. “They should have accepted you. You don’t talk too much. You’re not too loud. We like that you sing and talk. You know that Geralt and Ciri love you so much. And I’m…fond of you, Jask.”

Jaskier chokes out a laugh. “I’m fond of you too, Yen.”

Yennefer presses another kiss into Jaskier’s hair.

When Jaskier stops crying, he pulls away and wipes his face on his shirt.

“Are you still tired?” Yennefer asks.

Jaskier’s shoulders slump. He stares at the blanket.

“Are you scared to go back to sleep?” Yennefer asks.

Jaskier sighs but then nods.

Yennefer takes her boots off and then sits with her back on the headboard. “Would you like to try something to help you sleep?”

Jaskier’s face crumples a little and he makes a small noise before nodding.

Yennefer puts a pillow in her lap and waves Jaskier over. “Rest here,”

Jaskier curls up on the bed with his head on the pillow in Yennefer’s lap. A few more tears spill down Jaskier’s cheeks and Yennefer carefully thumbs them away. Yennefer gently runs her fingers through Jaskier’s hair. Jaskier sighs in contentment.

“You’re safe here. I’ll protect you.” Yennefer whispers mostly to herself as she tucks some of Jaskier’s hair behind his ear.

“I love you, Yen—not just because of this obviously—but now just seemed like a good time to say it.” Jaskier whispers.

“I love you too, Jask.” Yennefer leans down and kisses Jaskier’s cheek. “Try to get some rest. When you wake up, the two of us can try to find out when Valdo Marx performs here and make plans to ruin his day.”

Jaskier laughs—this time he laughs his real laugh—the one that makes Yennefer’s insides turn to goo.

“Okay, Yen.” Jaskier smiles, reaching up to caress Yennefer’s face. “Thank you.”

Yennefer leans into Jaskier’s hand and can’t help but think of how precious he is. She knows that Jaskier calls Geralt things like “dear heart” and frankly, Yennefer believes that Jaskier too has a dear, sweet, heart that has not been protected in the past. Which is a shame. But, at least Yennefer can try to help protect Jaskier’s heart now…the way he has begun to help protect Yennefer’s.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> My tumblr is @lotsofquestionslimitedanswers and I post my works on there too.
> 
> Please let me know what you think in the comments section!:)


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